Sorry I haven’t posted earlier in the week. With the extreme temperatures here in LA I got sick and then yesterday I got some interesting news at the day job which has me thinking about a change.

I also have been upset about the possibility that my friendship with M might be over. He called me a few weeks ago to let me know he is back in town and see what is new with me. After catching up on work and my family, I told him about the blue-eyed cutie. He told me he is happy for me and that it is about time. He knows that I have kissed a lot of frogs in the past seven years and that I was getting frustrated by the whole dating thing. He then started asking about my blue-eyed cutie, like how did we met and what does he do for a living. After I got him updated he asked when we could meet up. Since I am still working full time and we won’t be participating in the extra activities we usually do, I told him dinner would probably be better. He also gave me his email address so that if I needed a recommendation I could reach him. We didn’t make any plans but he told me he would be in touch again.

It took me a couple of days but I finally emailed him. We went back and forth for a bit and when I told him this is the first time I have felt okay with telling him I am dating someone because it feels so real, he got weird and said “Maybe it isn’t a good idea for us to meet up”.  I told him it would be fine and he said he would be in touch. He also told me he would have to meet someone to give him the “benefits” I wouldn’t be giving him anymore. I knew this would be a possibility and told him I understand.  The following week he called me to see what my schedule is like and we agreed on an early dinner later in the week and he would call me to let me know when.

Then I heard nothing till that Saturday when he sent me an email that night apologizing for not getting back to me and then proceeded to tell me that he met this hot 30 year old who is 110 lbs and that on the third date she went nuts (I’m guessing sexually) and that she also likes margaritas and fajitas. He also said he would be in touch soon. I was a bit hurt by this because of the detail of this person and it seemed like he wasn’t okay with things. I simply responded by saying, “Okay and hope we can have dinner before you leave again”.

And then there was nothing. With talking to my mom and a few guy friends and doing some thinking, I have realized there might not be this other girl. For one based on the way the message was typed he might have been drunk. Second and third,  he said this girl is 30 and 110 lbs which I think was a dig at me because I had told him about the JS situation when he started dating a 30 year old and he knew how much it bothered me. He also didn’t seem to have an issue with hooking up with a plus size girl for the past almost seven years. Lastly, he told me this girl likes going out for Mexican like we have done. It is all very strange that he would tell me about this girl and that he would go into so much detail.

Even though the last time I saw him which was almost a month before I met the blue-eyed cutie he said we could still be friends if I ever met someone. (And yes I do think it is a strange coincidence that when I saw him last we were discussing that and then a month later I meet my blue-eyed cutie.)

As of today I have not heard anything from M. It all hurts because I can’t believe after all this time we can’t continue the friendship part. I thought that was something we had built. He was the one who told me to find someone that can give me everything I want. Now that I have, he can’t accept it. I guess he must have thought I would always be there for him in every way he needed.


Don’t Speak by No Doubt